Mess!!!

Why would you want to call it the Mess? I mean really!!! I have always wondered and in the process I have managed to use up quite a bit of my free time (not that I am seriously busy anyway). It is the last place you would expect to find in a mess adhering to the fact that people eat in a Mess. A place that can ill afford to be in a mess.

Such was the gravity of the question that I submitted my self to its investigation for hours at a stretch. It was one of the more perplexing questions that I had encountered in a long time. After much perseverance I have somewhat managed to decipher the code in question. I may be grossly off the mark but allow me to conjour up the answer for it is one that befits the situation at MSE and the timing of the discovery of the answer emaculate.

The discovery of the answer was even more breathtaking. I woke up one morning feeling a little wiser and probably a little more enlightened. With long white locks and white whiskers that reached his stomach an elderly man looking quite young for his age appeared in my dream.Such was the radiance of his face that I was nearly blinded. However I remember his baritone clearly. He told me that there once lived a man in the middle ages who had perfect foresight and is credited with the discovery of the word Mess. Before he could finish his story the alarm went off. I woke up feeling wiser, now i had one vital piece of information that had the calibre of answering my question. I put much thought in to the fact that the man with perfect foreesight had coined the word Mess. After hours of contemplatation, rumination and a little confusion I arrived at the answer. It seemed to fit the bill just about perfectly and also its timing was perfect.

I figured out that the wise man had forseen that a boy would be born in God's own country. He would dawn the name of the Gods but his conduct would put the demons to shame. This boy would then grow up to be a bigger demon and then run a catering service in the sleepy suburb of Cheenai in an institution called MSE. This catering service would be one of its kind. It would not only earn the ire of the inmates of MSE but also defame the South Indian cuisine. This would not entail the food being bad becasue it is South Indian but becaue it would be very badly made. The choices that this service would offer would be a little different, a choice of not what one wants to eat but what one wants to avoid more.

Ramdasa's catering, in all its philanthropy, would intend to serve humans but the even the cows would refuse to eat the uttapam from this catering service. To top it all rice would be served with slimy looking, white harmless, well cooked worms. The management of the kitchen would be in harmony with nature, cockroaches would have full access to the refrigerator and the storage. The water cooler would be well protected from an invasion of flying insects with a series of cobwebs serving as the first line of defence and King Spidy would over look all assults on insets and humans alike that dared to infiltrate the boundaries of the water cooler. Ramdasa would be the Indian manifestation of Shylock-miserely, unscrupulous and clever. He would be allowed to steal water from the cooler with the help of King Spidy, his close accomplice. The curd rice would be Ramdasa's secret weapon against the inmates of MSE. With a liberal use of chillies, far more than what humans would like to eat, he would often prove a point. The dosage of Sambahr rice would so good that even the ice cream would taste like it. All in all, this would be a perfect Mess!!! One in which one had to be there to fully undertand that the origin of the word, for the first time in history, was not in the past but in the future. God bless the man with foresight. He gave us subtle hints, it's a pity we could not see it coming.